Before this new school year began (so last weekend) I made my three boys clean their rooms, the game room, as well as their bathroom. Ever since I taught them to clean their own piss off the toilet and floor my life has been much much better. My life has also been better ever since I quit venturing upstairs sometime in July. No broken windows to look at. No stinky toilets to smell. No slimy banana mush to step in. If I can't see it, smell it or feel it, then it doesn't exist.
In other news, I caught my seven-year-old with a Victoria's Secret catalog over the weekend.
I was helping him clean his bedroom when I entered the closet to clear out his dresser of all the clothes that no longer fit him when I found the magazine. At first I couldn't figure out what the heck this magazine was doing in his room, but I instinctively opened it to see what exactly Victoria's secret was. Instead I found my son's secret: Apparently he doesn't really think girls are disgusting. How did I know for certain? His little heartwork revealed it all:
What I'm wondering is if Victoria's Secret catalogs are fashion catalogs or soft porn. For real.
Then there was the sticky note.
According to my husband:
- My eldest is normal.
- My eldest is straight.
- My eldest has great taste in women.
PS: You can thank me later for not posting the image of the girl in her underwear in the doggie position on pages 60-61. Which also got hearted.
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