Screwed Up Texan has moved!

You will be automatically redirected to the new address. If that does not occur, visit
http://screweduptexan.com
and update your bookmarks.

Monday, August 9, 2010

They Don't Make Children's Movies Like They Used To

SAPark2


We've been considering getting rid of our cable service because A.) it is too expensive, B.) we don't hardly watch it, C.) we discovered Netflix. No, Netflix didn't ask me to mention them, I'm just uber excited that I found Return to Oz starring Fairuza Balk. I even got my husband to watch half of it. And I didn't even have bargain with him. I especially liked the part where Dorothy is laying on the cot all buckled down and about to get electrical shock treatment. There's also Princess Mombi who switches heads with the other heads in the glass cabinets. But my husband left when Jack the Pumpkinhead started calling Dorothy "mom."

Kids in school classrooms watching Disney movies are so deprived these days.

(I mean, who would've thought Disney would make a movie starring Dorothy Gale who goes to an asylum and then nearly gets her head cut off after hopefully spending a few years locked up in an evil princess' tower?)

Anyway.

Like I was saying, we're thinking about getting rid of cable for good. Sure, there are some television series that I will miss that I can't get on Netflix like I Didn't Know I was Pregnant! and Duggars: 18 Kids and Counting, but I mean who's really counting anyway? Last time I checked Big Love is on Netflix and American Idol sucks.

But then again I may keep my cable just until the end of the year. Why? Because TLC has a new reality tv series called Sister Wives about a Utah polygamist family and because weird is my game. I mean, if my church ever brought polygamy back and it was legal and stuff, then I'd totally be okay with my husband taking on another wife or two. Now he wouldn't be allowed to do it with them or anything, but I'd totally make them my built-in free nanny service. And if they wanted kids, well I have three so they could have their pick. I know for a fact they'd give them back to me and opt to be celibate for the remainder of their years.

Which reminds me, Michelle Duggar needs to babysit my kids.

Wait. Do they really have 19 kids?!

To my Anonymous girl friend in Spain who fell in love with a priest last year and then a gay guy this year, you could be first in line. Now that my husband taught you how to skin a prairie chicken, I'll have him show you how to skin a squirrel. Tasty.

With that, I leave you with Dorothy encountering the stolen heads:



Doncha just wish children's movies were more like this nowadays?

Screwed Up Texan Recipes
Want to offer me a bottle of Dr Pepper, guest post, advertise or tell me I'm stupid? Email Me!

11 Comments:

Becky said...

the only, and i mean ONLLLLLLLLYYYYY reason i couldnt give up cable is becuase of Sons Of Anarchy. Ive only middes one single episode live and it's bc I was in the hospital giving birth. true story. i love that show.

Melessa said...

Sister Wives?! How did I not know about this? I am SO excited. (And I guess not getting rid of my cable, though it would help the $$ situation here too.)

Ashley Sisk said...

Are you serious? Is there really going to be a show called Sister Wives...I better keep an eye out for that one.

Goat Mom said...

Do it! We/me decided to do it for the summer...we weren't watching that much anyhow. My kids haven't seen one commercial all summer long...and YES we have Netflix (through the Wii as well)...it's magical...oh & we are watch the entire season of Little House on the Prairie-seriously, talk about wholesome family tv time-haha!
Heres my original rant:
http://kimmekayo.blogspot.com/p/summer-without-cable.html
Take the plunge!!

Kristen said...

Netflix has Return to Oz?! Man that was a great show! We've been debating the whole Netflix thing for a couple of months---this might tip the scale a bit more in favor!
Though I have to say, Sons of Anarchy would keep us from giving up cable too!

And I agree--kids movies aren't what they were. Seriously, even the Disney cartoons--go watch Sleeping Beauty or Snow White. Those had some seriously scary parts. Oh well.

Screwed Up Texan said...

becky and kristen, you two will be happy to know Sons of Anarchy is on Netflix. You're welcome.

Melessa and Ashley, oh yah...if TLC makes Sister Wives only half as interesting as Kate plus 8 and Duggar show, I'm totally in.

Goat Mom, I never even thought about them not seeing commercials. Maybe they'll quit bugging me about moon sand....

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

Do it! Do it! Do iT!!!!!

We got rid of cable almost 3 years ago and we haven't missed a thing. Plus my kids can watch that Disney teen garbage on ABC on Saturday morning. One morning a week is PLENTY for us.

DangGina said...

Never liked the original Wizard of Oz, but after seeing Wicked in Chicago, I've contemplated giving it another shot. (Clearly, I've ONLY been contemplating, as I saw Wicked over 2 years ago and have yet to watch Wizard of Oz.) Having watched your little clip, I'm thinking I've made the right choice in hating Oz and not watching it again after all...

Maura said...

We haven't had cable for almost 7 years and I can't imagine paying for it now. Every time I am somewhere there is cable I can never find anything to watch anyway. And most shows are posted a few days after airing on the internet which is a plus. And your totally right about netflix, they have just about everything. I say go for it! :)

Nancy said...

My poor nieces husband. We were discussing polygamy one day and saying basically what you said, "Sure, no problem -- one can clean, one can cook -- just no sex." And she was like, "Are you kidding!? That is exactly what I would have them take care of." Heehee. So sad that she takes such joy in her "marital duties."

PennsylvaniaBelle said...

hahaha I need a sister wife for "wifely" duties!! I am so excited about that show!

Blog Widget by LinkWithin