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Thursday, February 18, 2010

I'm Gonna Chomp It Up


I'm beginning to believe my middle son and I are twins separated by twenty-three years. He is completely me when I was his age, but in a more boyish appearance. We talk the same. We're clumsy the same. We even think the same. Speaking of how we think alike--when I was his age, my mother thought I was mentally challenged and I even remember the day she took me to the hospital to have me tested. After all those wires were stuck to my head, the long breathing exercises, and the mundane questioning, my mother got the sad news that I was normal (but hey, I got to take home a butt-load of drawing paper...er brain scan results). I figure it's the same way with my middle son--so what if he looks like this:


He knows what a rhombus is.

Actually, I better go look rhombus up right now. Forget about if I'm smarter than a fifth grader--I'm not even smarter than my Kindergartner.

Must have been those shock treatments thumps on the head.

(Okay, that last part was a joke. Well the shock treatment part that is.)

Yesterday after school, my middle son lost his very second tooth. His very first tooth he lost at school and we never found it because he put it under his chair, and, being the Mom of the Year that I am, I didn't notice the missing tooth in his mouth for three whole days. Now, I didn't actually see him lose his second tooth either since my husband had to yank it out with string. I don't do forced pain infliction. I had to leave the room. Which reminds me how much I hate it when I take my kids to the pediatrician and the nurses tell me to hold my son down while they poke him with a needle or some other tortuous device. Are you kidding me? Why do they even suggest I help them do that? It's their job after all. I'd rather sit in the waiting room thankyouverymuch.

Unfortunately, once the tooth came out we also realized my son's permanent tooth is already halfway in and too far behind where it was supposed to be. So my kid has my crooked teeth also.

I guess the crooked teeth dilemma could be his trademark smile like me. We should patent the look.

Or I could just use Photoshop like what I did with me and Miss Dallas.

Before


After (check out that waist and teeth of mine!)


Beats the cost of braces.

PS: All this crooked teeth talk has me thinking of that one scene in Blue Streak:



PPS: My middle son asked if the Tooth Fairy could bring him a candybar instead of money under his pillow last night. That's my boy. And yes there was a Snickers waiting for him in the morning. I'm not helping the whole teeth thing am I?

PPPS: I still think Miss Dallas and I are sisters.

12 Comments:

Mindee@ourfrontdoor said...

It drives me crazy when my kids act like me. I like to think all my bad habits will die with me!

LoneStarLifer Paula said...

I win the prize for unobservant mom. Little J (around age 10) had to wear an apparatus in his mouth for about 18 months that was supposed to bring his bottom jaw out while it was still developing. It had wires and all like braces. I took him in to the reg dentist to get his teeth cleaned and they discovered that his cheek had grown around a wire. He had gotten hit in the mouth which pushed the wire into his cheek. He didn't tell us, just started eating on the other side of his mouth!!! We had to have an oral surgeon take it out, Little J had to be put under for the procedure. Then a week later he got hit in the mouth again and we had to go BACK to the oral surgeon. Fun times! Took me a long time to get over not knowing about that!!!!!!!

ForeverRhonda said...

I forget to give my son a check for lunch money the past two days! He had to eat a cheese sandwich yesterday. Luckily today my fiance took a check up to the school. So don't feel bad about not catching the tooth thing.

All of my bad habits dying with me...that is a good one, except I can see some of my habits in my son, and my niece is picking some up as she spends time with me. Oh no!

Karen said...

I love that he is just like you. Even better that you know he's normal and don't haul him in for the same experience you had. I crack up every time I see a picture of him with his eyes crossed. I wonder how many adults have told him his eyes will get stuck that way if he keeps doing it. (totally untrue, but my sister heard that a lot.)

Never seen Blue Streak. I am going to have to now.

Oh....and I totally would believe you two to be sisters!! :)

Taylor-Made Wife said...

You crack me up.

Screwed Up Texan said...

Mindee, that is what I was hoping, but I figured it's a lost cause...

LonestarLifer, Oh no! I would have reacted the same!

ForeverRhonda, I didnt know you had a son! I forgotten the lunch money too :)

Karen, One of the best movies ever!

Taylor-made Wife, What's really bad is when I crack myself up. Yep, I one of those that laugh at their own jokes even when no one else is laughing.

LoveFeast Table said...

Cute! I love that you turned out to be "normal" after all the brain scanning! That is hilare! And, you totally need a sash that reads "Ms. Bloggerific!"

Foursons said...

Don't ya love having a kid exactly like you? It seems like cruel and unusual punishment to me. I DON'T need a taste of my own medicine. Thankyouverymuch.

Jane said...

I want Photoshop lessons.
I don't want a kid again, even though I must admit you make it look tempting. :-)

Screwed Up Texan said...

LoveFeast Table, I heart you!

Foursons, but at least its in male form. Good thing he aint a girl b/c we'd have serious PMS battling issues in the future.

Jane, I make having a kid look tempting? You should see me at the end of the day when I'm hiding in the closet pulling my hair out. :)

Miz Affame said...

Miss Dallas and you where definately separated at birth.. Love your blog

Sell...Party Of 4 said...

aah snap, I knew I didn't do something before loading all of those pictures on my blog...I needed to photoshop my waist, and that darn double chin!! =)

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